Putting God First as a Christian Father
Most Christian dads say that God is number one, but is it really happening? Here's how to follow Parenting Principle #1, ancient advice from Abraham to Jesus.
Talking Points:
- Parenting is like everything else in life: if you put God first, the rest of it falls into place. That’s why our first Parenting Principle is: put God first. Deuteronomy 5:7-21,33, Matthew 6:33
- The command to obey applies to both parents and kids: parents obey God and kids obey parents. The fifth commandment (honor your parents) serves as a bridge between the “love God” and “love people” commandments. Deuteronomy 6:1-3, Ephesians 6:1-3
- Wholehearted obedience should impact every part of our lives – both personally and as a family unit. Learn to practice spiritual disciplines like prayer, Bible reading, and family time. Deuteronomy 6:4-7
Discussion:
- Initial reactions to this topic? What jumped out at you?
- Did you grow up in a home with spiritual values? How have those values shaped you as a parent?
- How would you describe the current spiritual climate in your home?
- Do you currently make a habit of reading and praying on your own? How can your spiritual habits affect the rest of the family?
- Read Deuteronomy 6:1-3. According to this passage, what is a parent’s responsibility? Why does obedience lead to a blessed life?
- Read Ephesians 6:1-3. Why do you think Paul emphasizes the importance of obeying parents? How does learning to obey parents help kids to obey God as adults?
- Read Deuteronomy 6:4-7. Evaluate your family priorities right now. What are some practical things you can do, as a family, to pursue God together?
- Check out pursuegodkids.org and pursuegod.org How can utilizing topics from these sites help to facilitate productive Family Talk time?
- Is there a step you need to take based on today’s topic?
How to Discipline with Love as a Dad
Today's culture says to let your kids do whatever they want. The Bible tells dads to teach their kids right from wrong... and to carefully discipline them.
Talking Points:
- There’s an ancient parenting paradox: those who love their children care enough to discipline them. Proverbs 13:24
- Contrary to popular opinion, there is such a thing as right and wrong. It’s the parent’s job to teach this in the home. Proverbs 22:6
- Loving discipline turns your child’s heart toward God. First they learn to honor you; later they’ll learn to honor God. Hebrews 12:11
- The 3 C’s of loving discipline:
- Clear: establish clear rules and expectations and the consequences for each.
- Consistent: follow through every time a rule is broken.
- Corrective: consequences should deter them from making the same mistake again.
Discussion:
- Who disciplines more in your home: mom or dad?
- What messages have you heard regarding discipline in our culture? Do you tend to agree or disagree?
- What are some of the foolish things you see in your kids right now? How can discipline help to correct those?
- Describe how your kids learning to obey you (now) will help them to obey God as adults (later).
- Read Hebrews 12:11. What can happen if you don’t discipline your kids? How can you encourage a heart of obedience in your kids?
- Talk about the 3 C’s of discipline. Why is it important to be clear with your rules and expectations? What rules do you need to make clearer to your kids?
- What has happened in the past when you were not consistent with consequences?
- What consequences are most effective with each of your kids right now?
- Is there a step you need to take based on today’s topic?
Affirming Your Kids as a Father Should
God the Father did it, and so should you. When you affirm your kids, you're setting the stage for everything else you have to do as a dad.
Talking Points:
- God the Father spoke publicly about the Son twice in the gospel of Matthew. Both times it was to affirm him. Matthew 3:17, Matthew 17:5
- If the perfect Son of God received words of affirmation from his Father, how much more do our imperfect kids need affirmation from their parents? Ephesians 6:4, Proverbs 16:24, Ephesians 4:32
- Every kid – even the most challenging ones – need and deserve affirmation.
- Remember the 3 B’s:
- Be intentional.
- Be authentic.
- Be unique.
- Use the 3 T’s of Praise:
- Talk: use your words to speak love and praise over your kids.
- Time: spend time with your kids and show them that they are a priority to you.
- Touch: show affection to your kids.
Discussion:
- Describe the “love” climate in your home growing up (affectionate/affirming or cold/distant?) How have those family dynamics affected the way you express love to your kids?
- Read Matthew 3:17 and Matthew 17:5. What stands out to you about what God said? Why was it important for him to speak those words?
- Read Proverbs 16:24. Share a personal experience you’ve had with the power of positive words. How have you seen encouraging words impact your kids in the past?
- Read Ephesians 4:32. Identify the behaviors in each of your kids that frustrate you. How do you need to be more tender-hearted toward your kids in those areas?
- Review the 3 B’s. What does it look like for you to be intentional with affirmation moving forward? Identify three unique traits for each of your kids that you will work to affirm more.
- What would quality time look like with each of your kids? What will that time communicate to them?
- Why is affection an important part of expressing love? How do you need to improve in this area and what kind of affection do each of your kids need?
- Are you familiar with the 5 love languages? What would you guess is your kid’s language? How can knowing their language help you to love them more?
- Helping Kids Set Boundaries
- Affirming Your Kids as a Father Should
- How to Discipline with Love as a Dad
- Putting God First as a Christian Father
- The Three Pillars of Biblical Fatherhood
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- Satan’s Strategy to Destroy the Family | Point Man #1
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