Watch the video above and talk about it with a group or mentor. Learn more.
Everyone has a little control freak inside of them. Whether it’s trying to control your spouse or your kids or your friends or your future, every control freak will eventually learn the same lesson: You are not God, and you are not in control. The sooner you learn this, the quicker you will find the pathway to true peace and freedom. The Bible speaks to this very issue.
Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.
Whenever we try to control something that’s not ours to control, we’re trying to be like God. And that’s a problem. This creates a cycle of fear: the more we try to control, the more we’re afraid of losing control. The more we’re afraid of losing control, the more we try to control. Soon our fear controls us. The only path to freedom is to surrender and trust in the Lord.
So how do you know if it’s time to choose surrender over control? Here are a few suggestions.
Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff
In every area of life, we must choose our battles. Some issues are just simply not worth our time and worry. Jesus taught this lesson 2000 years ago.
Matthew 6:25, 32-33 “I tell you not to worry about everyday life – whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn’t life more than food, and your body more than clothing?… These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.”
Food and clothing are important, but they represent many issues in life to which we give too much weight. Jesus calls us to consider our priorities. That thing you are trying to control right now… is it even worth it? Surrendering to God starts with evaluating what really matters in life.
Take Responsibility Where You Should
A life of surrender to Christ is not about sitting back and letting God do all of the work. There are many issues in life where God calls us to take ownership for our choices and actions.
Philippians 2:12-13 Work hard to show the results of your salvation, obeying God with deep reverence and fear. For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him.
Working hard to do our part results from trusting God’s work within us. So students should take ownership of their work ethic. Spouses should take ownership of their attitude. Addicts must own the steps they need to take in order to find freedom. But we don’t act self-sufficiently. As we surrender to God to do what he has given us to do, we also trust God for the desire and the power to do those things.
Leave the God Stuff to God
At the end of the day, there are always problems that are simply too big for us to handle on our own. These are the God-sized issues that we need to release completely to God. You can’t change the heart of your spouse. You can’t control your boss or your teacher or coach. You can’t heal somebody of cancer. But you can bring it to God in prayer.
Philippians 4:6-7 Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.
Have you been tortured by a situation in your life that you have tried to control? Is it time for you to surrender it to God in prayer? The sooner you do it, the sooner you will experience the peace and freedom that only come from Christ.
Discussion Questions:
- Watch the video together or invite someone to summarize the topic.
- Read Proverbs 3:5-6. Share about someone in your life who models this passage well. Why do you think they are so good at trusting the Lord?
- Describe the “cycle of fear” in your own words. When have you experienced this cycle in your own life?
- Read Matthew 6:25-33. What basic life issues do you worry most about? Why does Jesus say, “Don’t worry”?
- Read Philippians 2:12-13. How can a person take responsible action but also surrender to God at the same time?
- Make two lists. First, areas where you need to take responsibility for your part. Second, areas that you need to surrender to God and allow him to do his part.
- Read Philippians 4:6-7. According to this passage, what action steps should we take when we are faced with worry? What benefits will come to us as a result?
- Write a personal action step based on this conversation.
