Watch the video above and talk about it with a group or mentor. Learn more.
Bitterness is often called the little brother of wrath. It’s not as potent but it still does plenty of damage.
Bitterness Is Our Inward Expression of an Outward Hurt
Bitterness rears its ugly head when we’ve been hurt by someone. When someone offends or hurts us, we internalize that hurt which then breeds anger in our hearts. We want justice and we want that person to feel the pain we have felt. But God has another idea.
Ephesians 4:2 Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love.
God Wants Us to Live in the Light
Instead of allowing bitterness to swallow us and hold us captive in a dark and angry place, God wants us to live in his light that frees us from anger and empowers us to respond in a different way.
Ephesians 4:23-24 Instead, let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes. Put on your new nature, created to be like God—truly righteous and holy.
The Bible says that we are like a new person when we trust in Jesus for salvation. We can choose to live a different way, filled with the fruits of the Spirit. We don’t have to settle for bitterness.
You Choose What You Allow to Control You
We have to choose what we’re going to submit to in our lives. We can choose to bow down to bitterness and allow that to eat away at us and destroy relationships along the way. Or, we can choose to stand with God and allow him to change our hearts toward that person and that offense.
Ephesians 4:26-27, 31-32 And “don’t sin by letting anger control you.” Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, for anger gives a foothold to the devil. Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.
The enemy is waiting to devour us with our bitter thoughts. We have to fight against that so he doesn’t gain the upper hand. Instead, we need to love the way God has loved us. He chose to be kind, forgiving and loving toward us when we didn’t deserve it. This is how we should choose to be toward those that have hurt us.
- What is your initial reaction to this topic? What jumped out at you?
- What stood out most in the video? What, if anything, did you have a hard time grasping or accepting? Explain.
- Define “bitterness” in your own words. How is it related to the idea of “wrath”?
- What has recently caused bitterness to fester in your own heart? Do you feel like an injustice was done toward you? Explain.
- Read Ephesians 4:2. Name one or two of your own faults. Who in your life has been patient with you? Who has been impatient? Are you patient with others?
- Read Ephesians 4:23-24. What does it mean to “put on your new nature” as a Christian? What are some practical ways you can do that? Make a list.
- Read Ephesians 4:32. Describe how Jesus was treated unfairly for our sake. Do you think he has a right to be bitter at us? Is he?
- Write a personal action step based on this conversation.
