This topic is adapted from the PursueGOD Mentor YouTube channel.

Starting is important. How you begin a mentoring relationship sets the course for what’s to come. Find out here how to start a mentoring relationship on the right foot.

[Related: Mentoring New Believers]

Conversation, Not Homework

For Pastor Ross, some mentoring relationships didn’t get off the ground right because he didn’t clarify what the relationship entailed. His mistake was that he told his mentee to go to the pursueGOD.org library and pick a topic that interested him. The problem was that the information was overwhelming without direction and clarification from Ross. Instead of feeling like an invitation to relationship, it came off like a homework assignment.

In retrospect, Ross would have eased into the relationship conversationally. He would have narrowed down the potential talking topics to three or four instead of opening up the whole buffet line of pursueGOD.org, which was daunting to the new mentee.

[Related: Listening for Someone’s Defining Moment]

The First Few Topics

Mentoring is a skill, and all skills take practice to develop. As Pastor Bryan developed this skill, he learned the importance of wisely choosing the first few topics in a mentoring relationship. By being flexible and aware, Bryan is able to set his mentoring relationships on trajectories for success, growth, and a pursuit of God.

[Related: 4 Stages of Biblical Mentoring]

Look through the pursueGOD.org and FLEXTALK.org sites to find good, engaging content for those first few meetings, or you may risk losing the mentoring relationship before it even gets off the ground.

Written content for this topic by Daniel Martin.

Discussion Questions:

  1. Watch the video together or invite someone to summarize the topic.
  2. What is your initial reaction to this video? Do you disagree with any of it? What jumped out at you?
  3. What are some meaningful interactions you’ve had in mentoring or small group relationships?
  4. What are some interactions in mentoring or small group settings you wish could have gone differently?
  5. When we are seeking to “mentor” or “disciple” another person (or to be mentored or disciple) what are we really seeking? Explain.
  6. Write a personal action step based on this conversation.

Ministry Tools: