Watch the video above and talk about it with a group or mentor. Learn more.
Bryan and Chasen talk about how parents and teachers may not always pick up on what’s going on in the life of their students. Therefore, it is important for students to intervene in their friend’s lives who may be thinking about suicide. Teenagers and young adults can learn to do this through the acronym L.E.A.N. Through these simple steps you can help your friend understand that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.
Warning Signs for Someone Thinking About Suicide
Certain things like the loss of a close family member or the breakup of a dating relationship can lead to a teenager or young adult becoming depressed. When depression lasts a long time, some students can become suicidal. When a student begins to do things out of place from their normal behavior, these can be warning signs of depression or suicidal thoughts. For example, it could be a radical change of appearance, like hairstyles, dress, or hygiene. A student can lose their appetite or change their sleep habits. Also, a student can become distant and quiet around their friends or family.
The following acronym L.E.A.N. is a simple way to remember the steps it takes to help your friend when they are contemplating suicide.
Step #1: Listen
When your friend is being emotional or talking about something important to them, it’s your job is to listen, even if what they are talking about doesn’t seem that important to you. Listening shows your friend that you care about them and what they have to say. Remember, talking to you about their thoughts and feelings is their way of asking for help.
Step #2: Encourage
Once you begin to listen to them, encourage them to tell you more and open up about the reasons why they are feeling sad or depressed. Also, encourage them to talk to their parents, a teacher, or a counselor about their feelings and thoughts. Together, with other important people in their life, you can remind them that life is valuable and that there are many good reasons to live,
Step #3: Ask
You immediately need to find some help for a suicidal friend, even if they ask you not to tell anyone. You can do this by asking them one or more of the three following questions. First, “will you go with me to get some help?” If they say no, you can ask the second question, “will you allow me to go get you some help?” Finally, the third question is, “will you promise me you will stay safe from self harm until I find you some help?” These questions may be awkward and hard to ask, but your “love for your friend should overpower your fear of asking the questions” and getting them the help they need.
Step #4: Notify
Once you ask your friend’s permission to get them help, it is extremely important that you tell someone like your parents, a teacher, or a counselor about his or her’s suicidal thoughts. If your friend refuses to allow you to notify anyone, at the risk of them being upset at you, you still need to go tell someone. Remember, you never have to promise your friend you will not tell anyone about their depression or their thoughts about suicide.
By remembering the acronym L.E.A.N., you can help save a friend’s life. You can show your friend your care about him or her by listening and encouraging them to talk about their feelings of depression. You can also get your friend the help they need when they become suicidal by asking them permission to tell someone and by notifying an adult who can keep them from harming themselves.
- Watch the video together or invite someone to summarize the topic.
- What is your initial reaction to this video? Do you disagree with any of it? What jumped out at you?
- When have you felt sad or depressed? How long did it last? Who helped you feel better? How did they help?
- How does just simply listening to someone help them feel like you care about them? How can you become a better listener?
- Why does it feel awkward to ask someone if you can find someone to help them? What would you do if they said no?
- Have you ever had to break someone’s trust and confidence and tell someone else what they asked you not to share? What happened?
- Do you believe it is better to lose a friend in order to possibly save a life? Why or why not?
- Which step in the L.E.A.N. acronym do you think is the most important? Why?
- Write a personal action step based on this conversation.
