Watch the video above and talk about it with a group or mentor. Learn more.
You may have some misconceptions about what modesty is all about. Discover some important principles by debunking some common myths.
Key Points:
- Myth #1: The same rules of modesty apply to everyone, everywhere. In some cultures, it’s not considered modest for a woman to show her hair. In others, it’s okay for a woman to show her belly or midriff.
- Myth #2: Modesty means dressing so that guys can’t lust after you. Lust isn’t just thinking someone is attractive, it’s about having the thought, motive, and intent to commit a sexual act with someone…even if only in your mind (Matthew 5:27-30).
- Myth #3: Dressing to look cute for guys is an ungodly motive. It is normal and healthy to dress nicely and take care of your hair and makeup for your spouse, boyfriend, or a specific man you’re interested in.
- Dress in a way that says, “I’m worthy of respect.” Look at what’s going on in your own heart. Why are you choosing to dress one way instead of another?
Quote This:
1 Timothy 2:9-10 (NIV) I also want the women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, adorning themselves, not with elaborate hairstyles or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God.
Talk About It
- What is your initial reaction to this topic? What jumped out at you?
- Why do you think some women wear tight or revealing clothes? Have you been tempted to do the same?
- How do you define “modesty”? Why do you define it this way?
- How do you determine what is appropriate or inappropriate to wear?
- Read 1 Corinthians 6:19-20. How should these verses guide the way we think about modesty?
- Do you think standards of modesty are fairly applied to both men and women? Why or why not?
- Read Matthew 5:27-30. What does it mean to “lust”? Can you control whether or not other people lust after you? Explain.
- Is there any relationship between your modesty and someone else’s lust? Explain why or why not.
- Read 1 Timothy 2:9-10. How should these verses guide the way we think about modesty?
- How can you dress in a way that says, “I’m worthy of respect”?
- Do you think modesty is more about a specific set of standards or is it more about your mindset or where your heart is? Explain.
- Write a personal action step based on this conversation.
